A friend was talking last night about the fact that he gets so despondent. He’ll get a
rush of insight about something, and it will trigger a flood of insights that will come.
He’ll be uplifted by the passing flood of insights, even about minute things but mostly the seeing into important things he’s been blind to. Then he’ll go to bed one night and wake up completely in a hole and not know how he got there. The insight is gone. He looses all the insights. He can’t remember anything that he’s gained. He feels completely dissipated and spent and doesn’t know what hit him.
I really raised his eyebrows when I told him that the whole point of the conscious
effort, the whole thing you want about insight, is the insight to insight. You want to be
able to get to the point where you can see how to bring insight into the hole, to keep it from crushing all the progress. That’s the only impediment to an endless, continual
consciousness of insight, which is what I finally got to. The key was to seek and pray,
literally pray, for the insight to see what causes the depressions, because the depressions are what destroy everything.
Every time you have a specific fall into a depression, some one, specific emotional
experience is involved in it, and only one. There can be a string of depressions caused by different emotions. When you resolve and dispel one big depression through conscious effort and insight – if you ever accomplish this once, you’ve learned the root to dispelling all depression. Free association is the biggest key. Also, you conquer the hopelessness by facing it.
The minute you can generate a goal, depression dies. The thing about depression is
that you can’t generate a goal. A negative long-span thinking situation is always a case of the dog chasing his tail.
To be genuinely clear, which doesn’t have anything to do with Scientology’s “clear,”
is to have answered every question you have had to date, and I’ve been there on a regular basis. If that isn’t paradise, I don’t know what is. It is to have taken every feeling that ever came into your comprehension and to have traced it all the way back to its roots.
A funny thing about depression is that it takes just as much effort as it does to be
positive, but you end up with totally different results. The activity itself is not so much the key as what it produces. Being positive about things is equally as real as being negative. You have the same input, different outlook and results. The only way you can determine better or not between them is by what they produce. Between them they both suffice.
If you let negativity get hold of you, it becomes consuming and you are negative
about everything. There is nothing worse and more draining than having to hate. About the only way you can correct it is to be positive about little things at a time.
from Jim’s book, At Home With the Inner Self